Chapter 6 - What To Wear, When
Fool-proof Wardrobe Plans for Every Occasion
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Backyard BBQ
Outdoor parties are the perfect opportunity to have fun with your outfit. I generally look to strappy sundresses and flat, slide style sandals in the spring and summer and a comfy pair of boyfriend-styled denim with a dark floral shirt and flat boots in the fall. Pool parties call for swimwear that is classy, not too revealing, and worn with appropriate cover-up, no oversized old tee shirts allowed! If there are any pitfalls to putting together a good look, they are: trying to look too young, showing too much skin, or wearing too-high sandals for outdoor walking.
Brunch
What a delightful concept brunch is! I rarely eat a large breakfast, but taking time to meet dear friends or family for a special meal - mid-morning! - is such a treat, wearing just “any old thing” simply will not do. (Plus, the foods are so yummy they deserve to be celebrated.) Brunch attire deserves a little extra effort beyond dressing for the everyday luncheon outing. A simple dress will always work, perhaps topped with a cardigan sweater to add a dash of polish. Trouser styled pants with a silky blouse or cashmere sweater is another great option. Things to avoid: blue jeans, sneakers, workout wear.
Cocktail Party
People wear all sorts of ensembles to cocktail parties these days, and while it is fun to experiment, do so well before the big event so you know you have everything you need to pull off a great look. I prefer wearing a solid back cocktail dress. There are so many great options in varying lengths, sleeve and neckline styles, and fabrications. If you are worried about a dress being too plain, Little Black Dresses are known to be chameleons, changing their vibe with the change of a necklace, scarf or shoe. Red dresses work great for cocktail parties as well as dresses with subtle beading or sequins, for really special nights, such as New Year’s Eve. Remember, go for sophisticated rather than sexy, luminous rather than sparkly!
Coffee Date
Nothing can soothe your soul like a coffee date with a bestie! With her you can let your hair down and pour your heart out. Don’t short-shrift this special gal by meeting her in yoga pants and an oversized sweatshirt! Denim always works for a meeting in a coffee house, whether the ubiquitous skinny jean paired with an oversized sweater or draped top, or a trouser styled, wide legged pair of jeans with a cozy sweater. Important things to avoid: anything uncomfortable to sit in (as often spaces are cramped or sitting at high-top tables is required) and wearing light colors! Trust me, I speak from experience!
Concert
This category is tricky, because your look is often dictated by what kind of live music you will be going to hear. For practically all kinds of country, reggae or pop, a flowy, floral dress worn with boots and topped with a denim jacket is going to suffice just fine. For jazz, classical or opera, I always go for the Little Black Dress, it just depends on which one! One that is languid and flowy for jazz, simple and refined for classical and for opera, well – you can really deck out for that. Consider a black tea or floor length gown with an opera-length (26-36 inch length) strand of pearls!
Date Night
It is imperative to dress up for a night out with your special someone. Creating a special outfit shows your understanding of the preciousness of the relationship, and the importance of time spent nurturing it. Taking care to wear something that is above the ordinary speaks of the value you place on the relationship. You are honoring your significant other, and even more importantly, God, who in His kindness has gifted you with this person you love. That said, it doesn’t need to be an outfit confounded by lots of moving parts - again, here I am such a fan of the dress. It’s truly a “one-and-done” for busy ladies. And, as much as I love the LBD, date nights are really a great opportunity to expand your horizons with colors and patterns, shoes and jewelry. It is also an opportunity to tastefully dress a little more seductively than a Christian Fashionista ordinarily would, as you are merely seeking to please your husband or beloved boyfriend. Off-the-shoulder, strapless, or deep vee necklines are great ideas here. Try a more figure-hugging silhouette than you normally would consider wearing. This is your opportunity to have fun, but remember the key words are “lovely” not “lusty”, “sensual” not “sexy”, “timeless” not “trashy!”.
First Date
First dates are always fraught with angst. Having a tried-and-true ensemble ready and waiting in your closet will take away a lot of the inherent stress. Please remember, this is definitely a time for the “less-is-more” concept, and I don’t mean in the number of garments! You don’t want to appear too indifferent, too pretentious, or too sexualized. Some fool-proof looks are:
~ A dress, (whether it be an elegant solid colored shift, graceful fit and flare, wrap style, or not too body-concious sweater dress) paired with a pair of sleek pumps or a high-heeled boot, depending on the season.
~ A pair of dark washed denim with a lacy blouse, or, in cooler weather wear with a lace trimmed camisole and fitted blazer, or leather jacket. Slingback heels, and pearls complete the look perfectly.
Formal Dinner Party
Again, you absolutely win here in a well-chosen red or little black dress. Knee length, mid-calf, or dramatically down to the ankle, pair your dress with a diamond brooch, or statement earrings. Dresses with gold or silver shimmering details, or made of solid-colored sequins, are also a great way to “get your sparkle on!” Or, consider an all-black evening suit, (Google designer Yves Saint Laurent’s “Le Smoking” tuxedo styled suits for great French inspo) with lace camisole, fitted turtleneck, or for the daring Fashionista, nothing under the jacket but a statement necklace, draped in such a way that you remain modest. These suits are great investments because you can wear both the jacket and the trousers in a myriad of other combinations for countless outings and events.
Funeral
Did I say, Little Black Dress? Oh, yes I did. Again. You can see why this amazing piece is such a solid pillar of The Christian Fashionista wardrobe! In this instance, the simpler the dress the better. You are attending a funeral out of respect for a loved or revered figure and as a loving and prayerful support to grieving family; this is not a time for you to garner attention. Not a big fan of black for mourning? Many people these days hold Celebration of Life memorials rather than traditional or formal funeral services, and if so, it can be appropriate to wear colors and prints, however they should still be subdued in nature. I love the idea of light grey or tweed fabrications here, or perhaps a gentle floral print. Restraint should always be on the forefront of your mind, however, when you dress for a somber occasion such as this.
Interview
Interviewing for a new job is kind of like going on that first date. Confidence is paramount. Having a solid interview outfit is key, and in today’s much less rigid office etiquette, it really is not difficult to put together. I love the look of solid-colored separates (they don’t need to be matchy-matchy) with a solid white, or striped tee shirt underneath. Consider a Black jacket with a pair of camel colored slim-fit pants, a white tee, and a textured pump styled shoe. Medium sized gold hoop earrings to offset the gold belt buckle and a solid black leather tote rounds out the look! Remember, your aim is to show that you are certainly current, and you care about style and details, but you are more focused on your potential career move than high fashion!
Office Party
Start your day with a dark colored pencil skirt and solid blouse or sweater. To make an easy transition for an evening of cocktails and schmoozing, simply switch the sweater for a lacy or leopard print blouse; exchange your solid pumps or boots for strappy high-heeled sandals. Then: hair up, lipstick on, and add a pretty pair of dangly earrings to complete the look. Another very doable option is to wear a pretty and feminine black and white dress for your regular day, and then add in a statement necklace for a quick transition that will kick the dress up a notch!
Play Dates
Simplicity is key. Comfort is a must. You need to be able to run after your little ones with the greatest of ease, so pants or shorts are always on point for parks, playgrounds or birthday parties. Jeans with a bit of stretch to them are always a perfect choice paired with lace-up sneakers, slip-on loafers, or comfy booties with flat or chunky heels. Simple tees or pullover sweaters that are of washable fabrication are a must. Having a solid-colored longer jacket or cardigan sweater, (again with pockets), on hand is a great way to add a bit of polish and functionality. Excessive accessories (other than the ubiquitous “mommy” tote) are not necessary here; just more to keep up with when your attention needs to be on the kids.
Travel
Traveling, whether by car, plane or train, is not for the faint of heart these days. One must look confident, but also be comfortable as long delays are always a real possibility. The key to creating a successful travel outfit is to mix comfy items, such as leisure/sweatpants, with classic tops, (i.e. long sleeve tee-shirts, pullover sweaters, finished with a trench or menswear styled pea coat or long wrap to keep off stray breezes or unruly ac vents. Important details to keep in mind: don’t wear excessive amounts of jewelry, or heavily decorated belts for fear of setting off metal detectors, pockets are a must, and slide-on shoes are preferable to anything laced or buckled for ease of removal on long flights or train rides.
Wedding
There are so many alternatives to the traditional church and banquet hall weddings of decades past. It’s no wonder that a girl gets stressed when trying to put together an appropriate look. From beach weddings, to nuptials in barns, forests, mountains, and everywhere in between, no matter where you are invited and at what time of day or night, there are a few simple rules to keep in mind as you dress! Rule No.1: Never wear a white, or cream color. You do not wish to be mistaken for the bride. Rule No. 2: Never wear anything too revealing. Again, this is not an opportunity to be seeking attention; all eyes should be on the bride on her most special day. Rule No. 3: Make an effort! Weddings cost an outrageous amount of money now. Being included in one is a real testament to how the couple and their families hold you in high regard. Show them you appreciate being part of their special event by wearing an outfit that shows you put thought and effort into your ensemble.
Daytime wedding: This is one of the few times where it really isn’t appropriate to wear black. A chic black and white floral, maybe. Brighter colors are generally the best. Try to match the theme of the wedding; if it’s a garden party, wear a lovely floral dress; a beach day? Try a long, flowy dress with sandals and dangly earrings. If the wedding is in a house of worship, wearing a dress is a must. You get my point, here? Occasions that are as important as two people joining their lives together, I think wearing a dress should be almost obligatory! A dress automatically elevates the occasion it is worn to. Wearing one tells everyone that you think their occasion is worth going the extra mile.
Afternoon: Weddings held after noon are a bit more open to creativity in dress. Usually, they are held in the later hours and the celebrating continues on into the evening. Again, dresses are your best options but skirt suits in darker colors can also work nicely, where you can remove the jacket after the vows have been said, revealing a lacy camisole, or silky formal blouse.
Evening: Any wedding that commences after 6 PM is generally considered to be formal in nature. Even if the invitation does not specifically state “Black Tie”, extra-care must be made to wear something dressier than a wedding that takes place during the day. Cocktail dresses in solid colors or refined prints are textbook choices here, as is the always perfect Little Black Dress. Donning statement-making diamond or rhinestone jewelry is certainly appropriate and remember, shoes must be dressy yet comfortable enough for dancing!
Work Conference
Attending a work-related conference, workshop, trade show or seminar requires you to keep in mind two very different parameters: sophisticated professionalism, and maximum comfort! These diametrically opposed needs dictate selecting garments in a fabric that has a lot of shape yet stretches, and one that does not wrinkle easily. Some great options are:
~ Ponte double knits (which are a blend of rayon/viscose, nylon/polyester and spandex/elastane.)
~ Cotton Twills with a decent percentage of Lycra or spandex to keep them wrinkle free.
Choose high-quality separates in these fabrics in basic neutral colors for mixing and matching various looks. Having multi-functional items, such as simple pencil skirts, or slim trousers that you can wear multiple times with different tops gives you plenty of options and takes up less space in a suitcase. Likewise, they can be worn both with a basic ballet flat, or a classic slingback heel, making it necessary to only pack two pairs of shoes!
(Work Event Presenter)
Keep in mind everything written above about attending a work event, plus these three other takeaways!
1) DO wear things with pockets; you will need them to carry remotes, pointers, stylus, pens, notes, etc.
2) DO remember your audience will see all of you! Select shoes that reflect your position as an expert in your field; also, it is vital to check your overall look - front, sides, and rear – in a full-length mirror.
3) DON’T wear loud, distracting prints or large pieces of jewelry for your presentation. You do not wish to distract your audience from your message, or your visual presentations.
Worship
Observing how many women appear in church these days was one of the many reasons why I started thinking about writing The Christian Fashionista. It hurts my very soul to see how people – not just women – seem to think of dressing for worship as merely an afterthought. They dress more for whatever else they might have going on that day, and then that becomes what they wear to church! I believe that visiting your place of worship must be the main focus of your day, and that pure act of obedience, reverence and love, should dictate dressing in a manner that reflects your humility before God, your gratitude towards Him and your genuine belief that you are entering into His incredible presence. A dress is what is appropriate, or at the very least, a suit or skirt and blouse. Shorts are never appropriate, nor are jeans or lounge or sportswear. And while I am not an ultra-conservative fashionista (in that I do appreciate the form of a woman’s body and that each should accentuate their natural beauty to the best advantage possible), I do believe that it is respectful to the Almighty and in sincere regard to everyone else, to wear your necklines and hemlines in a reverential manner; nothing above the knee or below the breastbone.
Photography by David Mark Flathman